Tuesday, May 7, 2013

The joy of the outdoor

Oh, to sit in the garden watching the children play - one on the trampoline, one idly swinging on the swinging garden bench, and another attempting to beat his brother's record on the pogo stick.Sometimes, I get the children's colouring, activity books and a few toys down to the deck and sat with them helping each one out in turns. What a pleasure to be out in the evening sun, and seeing the children soak it up. Krithika loves to just lie down in the sun. She's a lounger, by nature. Give her a few minutes outside and she'll settle down in the most comfortable place in the sun, playing and talking to herself. Kashyap is a doer. He'll chatter away to me about things in school, but more often than not, take a book and read or pick up an activity book and get busy for a good hour or so. Kaustubh is a fiddler. He loves fiddling around with anything that can be fiddled with. He will do his studies for a short while and be off to dig the ground, prance around on the pogo stick, stack up the used planting pots and use it as a set of bowling pins. And if the game he's made up is interesting enough, he will coerce his brother and sister into joining him. And me, I am an observer. I can sit for hours on end, just observing the children play. Be with them in the sun and maybe grab a  book. The lastest I am on, is a fairly old one - 'Stories to be read with the lights on' - Short stories collated by Alfred Hitchcock. And I must say, its lives up to the hype he creates in the introduction. And now, back to the garden. I spent most of Sunday in the vegetable patch. De-weeding and getting it ready for planting. Now have carrots, strawberries, beetroot, peas, spinach, tomatoes, pepper and courgettes planted. Maybe, this weekend, we'll plant sunflowers as well, but I am not overly fond of the plant. Its just an easy one to grow, and the flower is a big hit with the children. Kaustubh picked one red pepper of the plant the day before and Krithika, one from the Cherry tomatoes. How they loved doing it. And all of them finished all the red pepper pieces that was in their plate for dinner. I am glad we moved into the new house in spring, so we have the time to set up the garden for what I am sure, is going to be a good summer. I hope it is, if just to make up for the utter lack of it last year. A laundry line, some more flowering plants, a few fruit trees, bird feeder and a bamboo patch will complete my to do list for the garden, for this year. And, I am going to apply strict self control and not buy everything that looks good. I so often end up buying small things and cluttering up the garden, that this time around, I am reminding myself that simplicity is what I need... There are the two vegetable patches, a fairly large trampoline, a patio dining set, the swinging bench, deck and the lawns in the middle. And the items from my to-do list will pretty much fill up the rest of the extra space in the garden without eating into the open space left for the children to play. Here's to a good summer, good harvest and some good times in the garden....!

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Anguish of the unborn

Warm and safe, nestled I lie
No dreams and no nightmares torment.
Growing as nature intended me to be
A tiny speck of life, as yet dormant.

Do I know if I am wanted..
If who gave me life willed it so?
Do I know I am loved and will be cared for
That I am their bundle of joy? No..

But I am snug and safe where I am
Doesn’t that mean they want me much?
Soon I’ll grow, be the baby they longed for
They’ll feel my joy with my every punch..

But what is that noise I hear..
A sound so dreadful and its coming near..
I see something that I haven’t seen before..
I feel threatened, I feel fear..

Its taking away the only home I’ve known,
And its getting closer to me..
Now I know that its me, it wants
But I don’t want to leave, let me be..

I am near the monster, just seconds away,
My despair and longing, I can’t but share
I know now I wasn’t wanted,
It isn’t right, it isn’t fair.

I would have been the baby you loved most,
I would have made you laugh and rejoice
Oh why didn’t you let me live..
Why do I have no choice…?