Before a mom

Nov,1981-Nov,2005
Cochin,Kerala-Chennai,Tamil Nadu, India

Mom...I have wanted to be a mom from when I saw a baby, that was when I was 10 years old. It was dream to have a cute little bundle, full of mischief, laughter and fun. I would run over to any neighbors place if they had a baby below 2 years. Carrying the kid around made me feel big. My chest would be puffed up with pride and I would comb his hair, dress her up with my clothes and donate my earrings, bangles and toys.
And then, I got married. Marriage was the best thing that ever happened to me. I married a guy I loved since my first day in college. We married five years later and would have spent a total of 30 days seeing each other during those five years! He was three years my senior and went to US one month after we declared our love for each other. After that it was the nightly phone calls..I would wait beside the phone, braving the biting cold and the long drawn conversation of another lovesick hostel mate to finally talk a few hours with him. We survived five years with nothing but the phone cable and wireless web between us and finally, after a long, frustrating wait, we tied the knot.
I wanted to do all the things I had been dreaming of those lonely years without him..jive, salsa classes, adventure trips, traveling far and wide, exploring places and restaurants and much much more. Kids were no where in the picture for me for a long time. But, as nature would have it, I faced a hormone problem and was asked by the gynecologist to conceive as early as possible. The fights that followed, the tears, the attempt to buy some more time all got me one year. I had one year of uninterrupted time with my husband. We made up for those five years in full and he satisfied my every wish even before I could express it.
And then, it was show time. I conceived with some difficulty. By then, I too wanted a baby badly, but nothing prepared us for what was about to come. The next one year, saw me being thoroughly traumatized, tested my patience to the core and showed how much strength I had during adversity. Being pregnant and being a new mom are experiences that most women share, but what I had to undergo would probably be one of a kind...the next post would have it all!!!