Wednesday, August 29, 2007

The before and after

This ones taken a day after the massive hair cutting effort ...

And here's the one taken a month back..the curls are not obvious, you gotto extrapolate the hair to a month later!!

Thursday, August 23, 2007

The first hair cut

When the clock struck twelve, the two of them stood with a scissor and a sheet of paper in hand. They crept silently towards the room, opened the squeaky door with pounding heart and looked at the sleeping baby. "No" he shook his head " the light is not enough." "Shall we dare switching on the light?" she asked. He nodded and the light was switched on. The baby blinked in his sleep but did not stir. Picking up courage, she held a few strands of hair up and he swiftly butchered them. The piece of paper was quickly filled with lovely soft black curly hair that she slowly threaded through with awe. The hair that was on the baby when he was born..the hair that he had in her womb, the hair that first saw the world. She knew she was being sentimental, but there was something spiritual about cutting your baby's first hair. They turned the baby slowly to his side and started clipping the hair at the back. He cut it real fine at a spot and they looked at each other, laughing. "Just because they can't complain, we really shouldn't be cutting their hair like this!" he said. "We'll see tomorrow just how good barbers we are!!" and they had a good laugh together. "Come on, its time for the next" so saying, she emptied the paper in the bin and they moved to the next room. The baby was lying with his hand covering his eyes and so the light was not an issue. Professionals by now, they quickly finished clipping his hair and they could just but control their laughter at the almost bald sight their previously long brown haired baby presented. Hand in hand, they moved from the room and hugged each other for another milestone completed as parents...The first hair cut of their babies, which they had the good fortune to do themselves!

p.s...the next day brought in a lot of complements! The kids were looking great and the two first time barbers were applauded for the great work!! yipeeeee!!!!!

Monday, August 20, 2007


Found missing since November 2005...

The person who used to be on her toes every second of the day, the person who used to believe that every second of life should be lived fully and till a few years back used to get anxious if she was not doing something worth remembering a few years from then (tho' she doesn't really remember all that she wanted herself to, so badly), the person who fell asleep trying to capture the myriad of things done during the day and failed because she fell asleep by the time she recounted till the noon, the person who at times felt like slowing down and relaxing like everyone else, but didn't know how to go about it, the person who got worried if a weekend was wasted by idling, a weekday was wasted if not working till 9 PM, the person who caught on 3 movies and a beer every week, the person who walked at 100 kmph and talked at 1000 words per sec, the person who did crazy things like ride the pulsar on the crowded highway, climb trees and play truant during final year college practicals, tonsure her head at age 20 and proudly go back to college without bothering with a hat, join an all boys club and go on two years later to become its coordinator and bring out the best performance with a team of majority girls and dare to fall in love with a person she met for 30 days in first year of college and managed to stay in love accross a distance of seven seas and a few continents........

I miss her a lot. If anyone finds her, kindly bring her back to me. She means more to my husband than me. If I could rewind the clock a bit, I would never have let her go, but she slipped so slowly from my grasp that it wasn't untill very late that I realised that she had gone. I am rediscovering her again, help me out, won't you?

Friday, August 10, 2007

Battle of Kruger!!!

Oh Wow!! Theres nothing more smashing than this video! If you wanna know more about family values amongst the animals, this is the video to watch!! The commentary is original and completely spontaneous and what more..its a classic case of suspense, thriller and drama all rolled in one!!
Go ahead and treat yourself!

Edited to add: This is an amateur video shot at Kruger national part and has had more than 90 lakh hits in YouTube. A few questions I have that anyone can answer?

Please do read this only after watching the video...
1. How did the buffaloes communicate that they need to go back and rescue the young one?
2. Did you notice the way they prod the injured young one into their midst and quickly form a barricade against the lions. The image of a buffalo was so far that of a lazy, dumb opinion has drastically changed. What about yours?
3. The lions who fought with the crocs to claim their prize let go once they saw the herd of buffaloes. What amount of decision making has gone on in their there something in this video that makes us rethink all our preconceived notions of animals?

Monday, August 6, 2007


I am definitely that, you have a choice whether you want to conceive or not, not whether you want to retain it or not. For us, knowing that we have our hands full presently, and that we definitely want a second attempt for a girl child, it was just a matter of deciding when, and the fact that I have a PCO problem made our mind for us. The earlier the better. So, we waited for a year and then didn't mind it whenever it happened.
But does the rest of the world think so? A prominent doctor in a prominent hospital we went to, to confirm the pregnancy propped this question to us the moment I showed her the self pregnancy kit and told her that we are parents to one year old twins..."First tell me if you want to keep it". Wow! It was quite a shock as that was the last thing on our mind. Here we were sitting elated because I had conceived without any doctor intervention especially when my previous gynec was convinced I would need another set of follicle study and the paraphernalia to conceive and here was this lady...asking us in that harsh and totally unfeeling voice if we want to keep 'it' or not! We never went to her after that. The very next day we took an appointment with another doctor in the same hospital who thankfully didn't react the same way. A relief for us..for, we really didn't want to hunt hospitals down looking for a humane doctor.
And what about the reactions of others? I somehow think the main attitude was..."Does she really need this after having two boys?" Two is the mantra these days and no one could understand my need to conceive once more. There are relatives very close to my husband and me who have not congragulated us even once or mentioned this fact when they come visiting! I do all the house work, cooking, looking after the kids and not once will they talk about the pregnancy, or if my morning sickness is causing any trouble...sorry guys..not talking of it will not take it away! And then, there are others, like an elderly friend of my mothers who said that you should not conceive till till you first kid is atleast 2 years old..and proudly went on to tell me how she had two abortions after her first kid...and for no reason other than that her first baby was just one plus and she doesn't want the added burden of another right then. Solid enough reason to take a life? I am a strong believer in god. What he has given, he alone has the right to take. We can prevent..thats our choice..but after that, its no longer in our hands. Infact, more sordid stories started coming out from relations and friends once I told them I am pregnant..another friend of mine in office had an abortion when her first child was a year old..and why? cause she was already having issues in office and didn't want her career to get affected again. Then why not take care, godammit? Why be careless and then take a bloody decision? Well, I do truly believe in divine retribution and the lady who promoted abortion and got two herself lost her husband at a very tender age..I am really sorry for her, but I believe that we reap what we sow..and nature has a way of getting back at us.
This post might be a bit harsh, but, I have certainly gotten to know a few things I would have been better off not knowing and gives me a relief to vent it out at this forum. No matter how difficult things are for us now, and we know that they are going to be worse in the year to come, we are jolly well glad that another kid is on its way and Karthiks and my love for each other and the sheer joy we get by being with our kids is enough to take us through it all. We just choose to enjoy every minute we get with the kids..every minute with each other..and in fact, every minute of the, won't you say its a wise choice we made??!!

Edited to add:
I think I am biased by the fact that I had a tough time conceiving the first time round ..and for an entire two weeks, spent time with dozens of wanna be mothers undergoing IVF. I saw their trauma and empathized with them so much that a baby has now become something very sacred..something that has to be worked for. And thats why we were so surprised, shocked, elated and grateful when I became pregnant out of the blue this time!! Maybe if I was not exposed to the other side of it, the side where people have been praying for a baby for years on end and suffering untold miseries, emotional and physical, I would not be so harsh on others who take the personal choice of ending it. But I truly well understand, as Anitha points out, that a kid who is not wanted should not be brought into this world by unwilling parents, but here again, we are sympathizing with the kid, not the parent. Is there truly anything that will make you sympathize with a parent that decides to let go of a life? The only other acceptable reason can be finances. But don't all strata of society bring up kids? If a life was truly important, we would definitely make the best efforts despite being financially tight. Lifestyles might have to be compromised, but it is just an inconvenience, not an impossibility. I can understand, but shall still be judgmental about couples who decide to abort because, somehow, every reason when you rip it apart, still boils down to either selfishness, an unwillingness to compromise and an aversion to physical pain. I know it is their decision, my feelings are not going to matter a bit, but, this blog, being my outlet, lets me vent out the steam inside and guys, please lets argue it there something I have missed out that can shake the conviction I have?

Saturday, August 4, 2007

Guess who??

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After thwarting off a hundred attempts to hijack my laptop, I finally let Kautu have a free hand with it..and the above is the result! Needless to say, after that, he pulled up the start menu and all kinds of pages started appearing and thats when I dumped him off the ground...before he lands up here posting it

Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Missing and mushing...

One week kachi and kautu were in chennai with my parents. And that was a week that had me up a roller coaster ride...missing them one minute and savoring the freedom the next! I took a day off and finished the seventh Harry Potter...something that would have taken me a week or more with the kids around! Hubby and I caught a late night show, visited friends and made it a point to not return home before 11 every day of the week!
But for all this, almost half an hour of our time together, be it shopping, or in the car, or sitting face to face in a quite and secluded spot in the costliest of restaurants and trying to recreate the magic of yester years, kachi and kautu were in our thoughts and words! We would be discussing something and suddenly I would exclaim " you know, if kachi was here, he would be making a beeline for that plant there..." and karthik would say.." yeah..and kautu would be sitting on the table and swiping away its contents in a jiffy!!"..and we would laugh...a pure laugh of sheer enjoyment no other discussion of our could ever have brought out.
So, whats the freedom I was talking about? Its just an illusion that having more time means freedom. That one week has brought this to me... freedom is the ability to do what you want to fully well knowing its consequences. It is not having the time to do what you want to do. For instance, it is purely my choice, influenced by no other that I decide to sit here typing away than being in office..I know I am doing it while the kids are sleeping and I didn't go to work today cause they are sick. To me, this symbolizes freedom. When the kids were in Chennai, I went to office every day of the week, spent the evenings roaming around with Karthik, but those were things that we did purely because we had the time for it. Not because we weighed the consequences and took a decision. Being unoccupied or having ample time seems to be a bondage that bonds you more towards things that are not in fact essential for you. What is the use of time when your mind is occupied elsewhere? When your mind is happy, it is free to think, to philosophize and create. And happiness to me in the smile of my kids and karthik's relaxed and contended face. And I am striving to keep these permanent with all my heart!!!