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Wednesday, May 23, 2007

In reply, I bared the one month of....

This is almost a guest post. I got the following email and with her permission, I am reproducing certain parts of the mail. It is so heart wrenching that for a long time yesterday, I was putting myself in her shoes and composing my reply over and over again.

Sheila wrote ....
.......................................................................................................
"
First of all, Belated bday wishes to Kachi and
Kautu(may i address them that way?). They are cute. Ur
blog is good. I visit ur blog but feel shy to leave
comments online. Besides I wanted to share a personal
matter. So, thought of writing u a mail.

My name is Sheila (name changed), am married and in Chennai.I love
to surf the net and came across ur blog. Actually i
surf for medical information and got linked to ur
blog. I had two premature deliveries in the 21st and
24th week and lost two babies due to incompetent
cervix.

I read in ur blog that u also had OS stitched and had
to be on bedrest, bedpans etc all of which i went
through. Please if u dont mind can u share some basic
information of ur pregnancy with me. I would like to
know at how many weeks was the cervical stich put for
you and what type of bedrest u underwent ( i mean just
getting up to go to loo or not getting up even for
that purpose). You mentioned that u were in hospital a
month before delivery and had to undergo sponge bath
etc, do share some details of that. At how many weeks
were the boys born and in which hospital?? My second
boy was born at 24 weeks in spite of a cervical stitch
and complete bed rest, but my water bag bulged out and
last 10 days before his birth , i was in hospital
using bedpan. My baby did not survive.

A sincere request, as i wish to keep my details
confidential, in case u happen to write abt my mail in
ur blog pls do not mention my personal information.

"
.....................................................

Sheila,
First and foremost, my deepest condolences for your loss.
But I do know that you have moved on from the very fact that you
are trying to learn more about what happened to you.

As for me, I have a condition known as PCO -Poly Cystic Ovary, due to which I
had to go in for assisted pregnancy. As a result of which, there were chances of
my uterus misbehaving. So, right from day 1, I was advised complete rest and a tablet called Duodilan (which helps in relaxing the uterus and preventing contractions).
I was started on this tablet the moment the doc knew I was having twins, as there is more chances of miscarriages with assisted twin pregnancy.

In spite of all the precautions, in the second month, the ultrasound brought out a
blood clot (called retro decidual seperation) just above both the embryos. I was
immediately hospitalized and given drips of the same tablet, Duodilan for four days till the mild pain reduced. I had brown discharge the next couple of days, but the pain never recurred. It was bedrest after this till the next scan. I would get up to use the loo, but was lying down all the rest of the while (and pretty boring it was, too! You cannot read or watch the TV much as your eyes start hurting after a while, so, it was mostly sleep and think and read a few pregnancy books!).

The next month scan was fine, the fetuses were growing well and the clot had
disappeared. The injections (HCG, to sustain the pregnancy) I was taking were stopped and that helped bring down my vomitting.
I had not used any tablet to bring down the vomiting, but after it went on for four and a half months, I took one in the morning for five days and that, combined with the stopping of the injections completely stopped the vomiting. Complete rest, except for a small evening walk was the mantra for this month.

Just before the scan for the 6 th month, I started bleeding. The hospitalization routine followed and this time it was duodilan drips for five days. But, all was fine after that. The month flew by and before I knew it, it was April 18th.

That day morning, I got this long white discharge in the morning. I called up the doc and she asked me to lie down and get to the hospital immediately. My mom brought the car, grandmom tied a dupatta tightly below my waist and I was taken to the hospital lying down in the back seat. I was totally cool, and was eating my breakfast when Amma rushed in with the car. She took one look at me and said that no one can react the way I did when labour was pre maturely starting! But, by the time the car reached the hospital, my leg weighed
a ton and I could not even lift myself from the back seat. My back was paining and lower abdomen felt very heavy. I was taken to the emergency labor room and the moment the doc did an internal examination, she said that one baby's head is almost out and that they need to do an OS stitching immediately to try and keep the babies inside. In half an hour I was wheeled into the operating theater and it was all over in another hour.

When I regained consciousness in the room, my mouth was parched, back was paining miserably and kaustubh (he was the baby lying lower down) was kicking away at the OS stitching. Every kick was misery and he just refused to stop. I wanted this misery to end...wanted the kids to come out then and there and wanted to just go home. All the bravado had disappeared by then. I was on drips and my stomach had reached much beyond a normal single delivery
full term uterus. And, this was my 28th week. Babies were 1.1 and 1.3 Kg. And I know now what would have happened had they been delivered then.

The nurse mistakenly asked me walk to the loo with the catheter on, just hours after the surgery and she got the showdown of her life from the doctor. After that one time, I was horizontal till my delivery. And that means, one month of lying down, bed pan for all natures calls, continuous pain whenever Kaustubh decided to make his presence felt, CTG to get their heart beat, hot flushes in the night and hubby and bro and dad and mom to support me day in and out. Every other day, hubby would give me a sponge bath and mom and dad would help out in washing my hair. I would put my head out of the bed and they would slowly wash and shampoo my hair. I would feel fresh and rejuvenated after that wash for the
next whole day. The antibiotics were one of the worst experiences this one month. After the cervical stitch, I kept getting infections and was injected antibiotics through an IV in the hand.

One was so viscous that after the injection, my palm swelled to the size of these giant frogs
you see in Discovery and they removed the IV from that hand and inserted it in the other. Now, all the veins in one hand suffered from Thrombosis, and two in the other also suffered the same condition. These were the times I begged the doc to take the babies out..that I can't suffer any more. She rightly told me that I would suffer more if they come out earlier, but, at the state I was in, I was just praying that the doc would decide to operate anytime. She would come for rounds every day and every day I would eagerly wait for her verdict. It was always, you still have months in the hospital to go. I remember begging
her to allow me to sit for just a second, but she was adamant. She also got me
some stuff to put on my legs to prevent muscle wastage from continuous lying down. Hubby would massage every night so that I can get a few hours of sleep.

At the 33rd week, I started getting back pain again and by then, my lower abdomen was astonishingly heavy. My tummy had grown so big that I needed Hubs help to lift it when I turned side. CTG was put again, and the internal examination showed that the stitches were beginning to come out. By evening, the drips too had no effect and the pain started coming in shorted intervals.

The rest is all history. 9.54 and 9.55 PM on the 18th of May, Kaustubh and Kashyap were born, 1.9 and 1.79 Kg birth weight. The next ordeal was about to begin. NICU was going to be my next home for the next few weeks and that is another post on its own.

But I know that I have suffered less than a lot of people. And I went through it all with a big smile on my face! Yes..the doctors and all the visitors I had that one month in hospital told me how I was always cheerful and how in spite of the eager wish to be rid of all this, I kept my spirits high. My husband was with me day in and out, we used to lie next to each other on my hospital bed and say Hanuman Chalisa every night, he brought the DVD player to the room and used to get english classics for me to see, dad n mom used to make trips every afternoon getting me lovely home food so that I don't have to suffer the unpalatable hospital food and much much more. I had all the physical pain to suffer, but my family made sure that emotionally I was kept happy. I know that I have never been this happy in the months following the delivery.

I hope I helped you, sheila. I hope all goes well for you.

Lots of love and prayers,
Krishnapriya

5 comments:

IBH said...

am in awe of you and sheila....i had a difficult delivery myself....but after reading sheila's experience, mine is nothing of that sorts….i hope and pray that Sheila finds her peace and all that she wants…..kudos to u as well….but with those beautiful babies in tow, I guess u ddi it right gal :)

IBH said...

i read it all over again....and god ! u are one survivor gal! all the best with those two gems!

Hari said...

PS: I was there with her during the last week or so.. Helping as much as I can..

Kittus.. Mollus.. You're damaging my reputation.. :) People already think I'm a terrible son.. I don't want to add on a terrible brother tag.. :) [ However true it may seem ]

the mad momma said...

i got a shiver down my spine reading this post.. God bless you.. may you never ever again have to suffer...

Anonymous said...

Hats off to you ! You are one heck of a fighter.