And I stopped feeding him after that half an hour of fear that I might give him a strong whack right across his cheek. I had a tough time keeping my temper in check and turned it on instead on my poor husband. He is still facing the wrath and trying to guess why I suddenly turned on him. Once he has put Kashyap to sleep I shall apologize and make him wiser.
Are mothers allowed to have such feelings for their real young 11 month old babies? Cause I've had this kind irritation and anger when they were just 1 month old. I would try my level best to make them breast feed, but they would suck a bit and then demand the bottle. I would sit for hours expressing my milk and giving it to them in the bottle. Imagine the hours wasted...First expressing at least 120 ml, then bottlefeeding them, one after the other...my days were spent inside a single room, sitting on that plastic chair with a pillow in my lap to support them or a bottle in my hand expressing. I have been very angry with them for not taking the effort to drink from me..."Babies, its not my fault that I had to start the bottle for you. There are two of you and I find it not humanly possible to breastfeed both of you, especially when you both cry at the same time and there is no help around..I am sorry for that, but why can't you just try drinking from me now instead of switching loyalties to the easier to drink bottle? I still want to feed you.."
My husband has an idea...let him go hungry till he cries for solid food...or even the bottle..give him milk till he wants to eat something solid. I don't think I have the heart for that..I shall keep trying till I can control the anger, till he cries from the irritation of being fed, till he runs away when he sees me coming with food. And once he does all that, I shall stop feeding him, feeling totally rejected till he comes back to me for food!
Bad Bad mom...but then, an equally bad bad son. We make a good good pair.
2 comments:
Hi KP
First timeon your blog. Lovely children - great pictures.
Will be back for more :-)
hi kp
Something that helps my twins eat is if I give them some independence to eat on their own. I let them eat finger foods by themselves first (its messy but worth the trouble i think) like soft fruit, cheese, rice, cooked veggies. Then I hand them each a plastic spoon to eat with and I go in with the mushed food or other solid foods with a third spoon in my hand. Sometimes they grab the spoon with the food and eat on their own and I let them and take away the other spoon in their hand. I have found eating/meal times to be a huge mess but they eat more by themselves than if I try to force feed. They are both on the smaller side in the US percentiles but I try not to worry because after every solid meal (at least 1/2 hour at the table) I follow up with milk in a cup and after that playing we follow up with milk in a bottle before naps or bedtime. Its all long and tedious with twins but I would rather do this than have battles with toddlers. We all know who wins then!!
Good luck and let me know if you find any success in this department.
A
Post a Comment